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Unicornturds69

Jade Connors
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golgothasTerror [GT] joined chat.

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timaeusTestified [TT] joined chat.

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TT: Jake.

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TT: Why are you staying inside? We've got fireworks going.

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GT: Jane sent me inside.

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GT: I am prohibited from setting foot out of this house while the fireworks are set out for display.

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TT: What? Why?

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GT: I almost blew up your truck when helping roxy out with setting them all up.

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TT: So just sit to the side and watch them, man.

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TT: I don't want you to be alone.

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GT: Could you take it up with the commander first?

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GT: I was warned not to be within a fifty foot radius of the fireworks or else my sparkler priviledges would be revoked.

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TT: Fuck her. It's my house too. And yours. Come on.

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GT: :o!!!

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TT: What did you not think about that? You're sitting in your room.

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GT: That wasnt what the gaping was all about!

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TT: Then what was it?

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GT: My mouth was hanging open over the fact that you just practically flipped jane the bird!

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GT: But verbally.

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GT: And she wasnt here to hear it herself.

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GT: When did you get so hardcore, strider?

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TT: Oh hush. Come on. *Dirk put out a hand.* We've got food finishing.

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GT: --jake grinned and took his hand, using it to haul himself up to his feet.-- are you the one manning the grill?

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TT: Nah. Jane's got it. I'm in charge of fireworks. Roxy is 'watching' the kids.

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GT: And i shall sneak past miss crocker! But only after i grab myself a plate of her scrumptous food.

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GT: Do you think she made macaroni and cheese? I hope she did.

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GT: Gosh, i think im doing a little!

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GT: Drooling****

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TT: Well. Let's go find out.

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GT: Right behind you!

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TT: *Dirk walked out, holding Jake's hand.*

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GT: --jake held onto his firmly as dirk led them out of the house.-- what sort of fireworks did you manage to scrap together? I only saw the brink of the iceberg before i was booted out of the operation.

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GT: ((brb! dinner time!

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TT: ((alright eat well.

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golgothasTerror's connection timed out.

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TT: *Dirk let go of Jake's hand as they rounded by the table. He laughed, ruffling Jake's hair.* Standards like quantums, serpents, purple rain, et cetera. And maaaybe just a few illegal ones. Welcome to Texas.

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TT: ((brb))

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golgothasTerror [GT] joined chat.

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GT: ((okey dokey!

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GT: Oh! Oh! OH! I want to handle the illegal ones! Please, oh please, oh please, dirk! Let me set off just one! Ill be your best friend forever if you do! --cue the puppy dog eyes. Cue the getting down on both knees. Cue hands being clasped together and bottom lip being stuck out.--

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TT: Fine, but I'm helping you. Also, I thought I was your best friend, asshat. *Dirk smiled, walking towards the stack of fireworks. He lit a sparkler, handing it to Jake.* Start with this.

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GT: You are but now youre my super best friend. --he took the sparkler, albeit a bit reluctantly. He waved it around nevertheless.-- a sparkler? Seems like a beginners type of deal, dont you think?

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TT: You are a beginner. Do you know how to fire illegal fireworks, English?

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GT: Dont you light them up like every other sort of firework?

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GT: It isnt rocket science.

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TT: Technically it is rocket science, and no you don't.

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TT: As a person who constantly buys illegal fireworks, I know the most. So you'll listen to me.

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GT: Yes, strider dearest.

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TT: Don't call me that.

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GT: Yes, sir! Strider, sir!

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TT: Oh my god. Stooop.

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GT: Aye aye captain!

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TT: You're like Roxy and the kids right now.

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GT: Is that such a bad thing?

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TT: It's just not like you.

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GT: :/

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GT: I was only being silly.

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TT: I'm joking too, hon.

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GT: Gosh, you sound so damn serious when you joke around!

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TT: I'm a master of my trade.

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GT: You got that right.

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GT: Anyways, when do i move up the ranks and earn the right to blast illegal fireworks into the sky?

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TT: Soon.

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GT: Soon as in when this sparkler dies out?

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TT: No. Soon as in when we blast the fireworks.

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GT: Damn.

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GT: And how soon is that?

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TT: In about thirty minutes. Want a beer?

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GT: A beer?

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GT: We were aloud to bring those around with the little ones running about?

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TT: Yep. Roxy has like seven near her and she's playing with the kiddos.

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GT: Huh.

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GT: Well, in that case, why the hell not!

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GT: Im not driving.

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TT: Exactly. *Dirk tossed him a beer, smiling.*

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GT: --jake caught the can, cracked it open and attempted to sip up the foam that poured out of the top before it could spill over and drip on his pants.--


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Medievalstuck!golgothasTerror [GT] joined chat.

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timaeusTestified [TT] joined chat.

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GT: ((Here I am with a medievalstuck prompt that has probably been done before a million times. Jake is the childhood friend of Prince Dirk, and develops feelings for him over time. But Dirk gets into an arranged marriage with a far away princess, and Jake is feeling Bitter(tm). )) At the age of five years old, Jake English was rounded up along with other children his age to the town square. The King had ordered a companion for the young Prince Dirk to be selected from this group of kids, to serve as his playmate and his companion and his sole friend. Out of all the odds, he had been selected. He was given a small yet luxurious bedroom within the castle, and a caretaker was assigned to him. Visitation for family of his was allowed twice a week, and he lived comfortably, and his family was paid handsomely in return for his service as the Prince's friend. Prince Dirk frightened him terribly his first few months on the job. While they were both only five years of age, Dirk was an intimidating presence to the young peasant-born boy. But as months and eventually years passed, things between them grew... Warm. When he hit the age of thirteen, Jake began picking up other jobs around the castle. When Dirk was busy, or not in need of a companion, he helped out at the royal stables, and soon would be seen helping out in the kitchen. He occasionally ran errands for the castle, heading out into town to fetch supplies. Every night, though, Dirk would request his loyal friend to be by his side. Feelings between the two began to blossom when they hit sixteen, forbidden attraction blooming. Many nights he had walked into the royal bedroom of his Prince, only to be pulled by his shirt into a warm, rough kiss full of desire. Hands would run over heated skin and they would kiss until they were gasping for breath and their faces were hot with a bright red flush. It never went more then two boys kissing the daylights out of each other with the occasional clothed frottage that would leave them panting. The news that Dirk was to be married off to a princess in a far away kingdom hit Jake like a bullet when they turned eighteen. He had grown attached to the Prince, his Prince, and it hurt like someone had stabbed him in the gut. When said princess arrived, a week went by, and Dirk did not request his presence. He was busy, all the time, getting to know the princess. It made the designated companion angry. One Friday afternoon, he sat in the kitchen, baking fresh loaves of bread, when they approached. That dastardly princess told him to hurry up with the bread, slave boy. Something inside him snapped. He had never thought of himself as a slave, not once. But he held his tongue and gave her the loaf. That night, he was finally called to Dirk's chambers after so long. Carrying a plate of freshly baked cornbread, he knocked on the door.

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TT: The door was opened just a few moments later and a not too pleased looking Dirk stood in the doorway. After taking a step aside to let the other in and taking a brief glance down the hallway he closed the door again, locking it. The prince still didn't bother to directly face Jake and instead made his way over to his bed, sitting down on the edge of it. "I'm sorry, you mostly likely already know that I was busy over the course of this week."

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GT: "i only came by to drop off a late night snack made by a few concerned cooks." the tray, stacked neatly with six perfectly squared off pieces of corn bread, was dropped onto a side table with a loud CLANG. "your servants informed the head chief that you barely looked at your plate let alone ate what was on there so they whipped up a small loaf of cornbread in hopes that you would be able to polish it off by the time i come back for the tray in the morning. You should eat it. I know you have a long day of courting pretty little princesses tomorrow."

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TT: He only let out a small sigh and reached up to run a hand through his hand, briefly rubbing his eyes. "Jake.. Would you please come over here for a moment? I should probably talk to you about this. I know I should have done this earlier, but I didn't have the time. Or courage for that matter..." It was hard for him to be in the same room with the other at that point, not to mention actually having to talk to him. Jake's mood and reaction to the whole situation didn't help.

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GT: "what is there to talk about? Honestly! Do you think i have been living under a rock this whole time? I understand whats going on, dirk, i am not an IDIOT. Once you and miss prissy pants get acquainted with each other your families are going to come together and announce to the public about the upcoming royal wedding between you two. After the announcement is made youre going to make that witch your bride, shack up with her once the vows are finalized, and then get shipped off to god knows where while you wait for her to bear your first of many children! Youre going to leave me behind so you can go and play king, i get whats going on here and i dont want to talk about anymore than ive already have."

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TT: It was fairly easy to tell how hard Jake's little rant hit him. With a pained expression and eyes still averted. After a small moment of silence he moved to stand back up and took a few steps closer to his friend, finally meeting eyes with him. "Jake, please. First of all.. try to keep it down a bit. I don't want the whole castle to hear about this. But either way.. you're wrong. I would never replace you with a complete stranger like that, royal or not. And especially not with someone as vile as her. You are too important to me, Jake. Believe me."

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GT: "but youre still going through with this buffoonery, arent you? Listen, i just." he takes a deep breath in, breathing out through his nose. "i understand that things could never work out the way we may want it to but i cannot believe that you would allow yourself to be wedded to such a, for a lack of a better word, bitch. You couldnt find yourself somebody more enjoyable to be around? Dirk, this is the rest of your life were talking about here! How can either of us pretend that everything is all hunky dory when we have that snake slithering around the grounds? Its like you want to make yourself miserable! You dont even say anything to her, you let her do whatever she pleases whenever she pleases. You just stood there while she called me your slave! You didnt even think about saying anything!"

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TT: He glanced aside from a brief moment, letting out a sigh. "You don't understand.. I have certain duties. And marrying her would be one. I wouldn't be the first to get married to someone you can't stand. It's simply what I have to do. The same goes for not unsetting her.. I'm sorry for not saying anything in your defense. I regret it, you can't imagine how much... But the point is, I don't have choice. Trust me, I would do anything to not marry her and stay with you, but... I would tell her I'm not imterested, but I can't do that, there's no point. Jake, I would even run away with you, but you have a family here.."

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GT: "there has to be somebody else in that family you could marry, isnt there? A sister of hers or a cousin perhaps? Anybody who wouldnt be opposed to...i dont know, to come along with you two? She doesnt like me dirk, not one bit. I know shes going to make you dismiss me from my duties! I just know it. "

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TT: Dirk shifted, closing the gap between the two and wrapped an arm around Jake's middle, placing his hand on the other's cheek. A few seconds of silence later he shifted once more and pulled him into an embrace. "You are a lot more than a servant, I'm not going to let anything come between us. I will do whatever it takes."

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GT: It took a couple of minutes for jake to crack, now throwing his arms around dirk to return the embrace ten fold. "we shouldnt have let it get this far, dirk. This is going to end in disaster, somebody is going to find out, theyll take me away if that happens. Maybe we should just stop while were ahead. I cant put you in such a risky position anymore and being jealous about the whole marriage ordeal isnt making our case any less suspicious."

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TT: Taking a deep breath, he rested his head against Jake's, just taking a moment to try and calm his nerves a little. "Don't say that. I would go this again, if given the chance. It doesn't matter how risky this is, all I care about is you. We can flee the kingdom for all I care. I would tell that princess to get lost and make you rule with me, by my side. There is so much more I would do just to be able to keep you close."

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GT: "you know we cant expect people to be okay with you choosing me to rule with you over your already bride to be. Not unless you want the both of us to be brutally murdered not three days into your coronation. Now, you know that i love you more than life itself but i cant let this relationship jeopardize your future as king. We both know that taking your fathers place triumphs over us. I wish it didnt but its the truth, you know it and i know it."

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TT: "I'd rather live as a farmer along with you in a small home with a few animals than having to rule with her by my side." He let out another long sigh and planted a kiss on his cheek, staying close. "Running away is still an option.. If not I'll have to get rid of her, before the wedding or afterwards."

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GT: Jake gave him a little shove, a glare to match. "what in the- dirk strider! You cant seriously be considering putting your fiance to death. I know shes a wicked woman but youre above murder!"

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TT: "You're more important to me than that. Either you leave with me or I will have to do it. But no worries, I obviously wouldn't do it with my own hands. Aside from that, I know you despise her just as much as I do. I couldn't live with her for more than a month."

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GT: "youre asking me to choose between two impossible options, dirk. If we run away together theres going to a massive search party sent out for your safe return and for my capture, theyll think that i seduced to the point where i convinced you to leave behind your princely duties for a life of sin! But if i refuse to leave with you youll send out some lug to go and do your dirty work for you. Which, by the way, wont solve a thing because you know that theyll find you a replacement just as fast as i can snap my fingers together."


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adiosToreador [AT] joined chat.

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terminallyCapricious [TC] joined chat.

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AT: gAMZEE,

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AT: gAMZEE, aRE YOU THERE?

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AT: i KNOW THAT YOUR STATUS SAYS ONLINE BUT, iT ALWAYS SAYS THAT,

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TC: yeah, i'm motherfucking here. what's up, bro?

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AT: ,,,

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AT: wHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR QUIRK?

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TC: THAT QUIRK IS DEAD NOW, BRO. :o/

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TC: what you trolling a motherfucker for? not that i'm up and complaining.

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AT: i WANTED SOMEBODY TO TALK TO,

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AT: aND FOR SOME REASON EVERYBODY ELSE IS EITHER OFFLINE OR PREOCCUPIED WITH SEEMINGLY MORE IMPORTANT MATTERS AS THEY REFUSE TO ANSWER MY REPEATED ATTEMPTS TO CONTACT THEM,

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TC: WELL THAT AIN'T MOTHERFUCKING NICE OF THEM, IS IT?

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TC: i'm all here, anyways, brother. always motherfucking happy to talk to one of my best bros. :o)

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AT: tHANKS GAMZEE,

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AT: i KNEW i COULD COUNT ON YOU,

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TC: OF COURSE. HOW YOU MOTHERFUCKING DOING, ANYWAYS?

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TC: got anything buzzing in your thinkpan you wanting to be sharing?

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AT: yEAH,

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AT: iT'S VRISKA AGAIN,

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TC: DID SHE UP AND DO SOMETHING? ... AGAIN?

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AT: yEAH,

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AT: sOURCES HAVE POINTED THAT SHE WAS PARADOX RESPONSIBLE FOR CREATING BEC NOIR,

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AT: i DO NOT FULLY UNDERSTAND WHY SHE WAS A MAJOR VARIABLE IN HIS CREATION BUT i CAN'T HELP BUT FEEL ANGRY TOWARDS HER FOR BEING IT,

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AT: i'M CONSIDERING CONFRONTING HER,

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AT: aND, wELL, rEMOVING HER FROM THE PICTURE IN THE MOST PERMANENT SENSE POSSIBLE,

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TC: motherfuck, well ain't that a pickle if i ever saw one. i'd be all kinds of angry at her finding that out, too. i am. she's never done anything good for any motherfucker.

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TC: YOU SHOULD CONFRONT HER, BROTHER. BUT BE MOTHERFUCKING CAREFUL, SPIDERBITCH HAS SOME WICKED TRICKS UP HER SLEEVES...

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TC: like sources have all up and indicated. honk.

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AT: dO YOU REALLY THINK THAT THIS IS THE BEST CHOICE?

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AT: i DON'T WANT TO DO ANYTHING i WOULD LATER REGRET,

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AT: wHICH IS WHY i CAME TO YOU FOR A SECOND OPINION,

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AT: tO ME, i BELIEVE THAT YOU HAVE THE BEST INCITE OUT OF THE TWELVE HERE,

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AT: dON'T ASK MY WHY BECAUSE i WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO PROVIDE YOU WITH A SURE ANSWER,

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TC: WELL SHIT, YOU UP AND FLATTER A BROTHER, BUT I DON'T KNOW IF THAT'S TRUE. I CAN TRY AND TELL YOU WHAT I'M THINKING, THOUGH.

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TC: i want you to confront her of course, she done all sorts of bad things, specially to you, so it seems like it would be all sorts of righteous, just if you motherfucking will, if you took her out.

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TC: BUT I ALSO DON'T WANT MY FAVORITE MOTHERFUCKER TO GET HURT EVEN WORSE THAN HE ALREADY HAS BY THAT BITCH... :o(

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TC: now this is a real motherfucking pickle, ain't it?

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TC: MAYBE SOMEONE ELSE SHOULD DO IT... I DON'T MOTHERFUCKING KNOW, THOUGH.

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AT: tHAT'S WHERE i DISAGREE WITH YOU,

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AT: iF IT HAS TO BE DONE, i WANT TO BE THE ONE TO DO IT,

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AT: sOMEHOW IT SEEMS LIKE THAT'S HOW IT WAS ALWAYS MEANT TO END,

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TC: i know why, like i said a motherfucking minute ago, it seems right. always do what you motherfucking think is right, tavbro. but don't get yourself hurt.

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AT: i MEAN, tHAT'S WHAT i AM AIMING FOR,

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AT: tO COME OUT WITHOUT A SCRATCH, aND, yOU KNOW, aLIVE,

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AT: bUT IT ISN'T SOMETHING i CAN COMPLETELY PROMISE?

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TC: THAT'S THE PROBLEM. :o(

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TC: she could up and kill you if you ain't careful, bro.

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TC: THEN THE PROBLEMS WE HAVE WOULD BE WORSE.

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TC: maybe you should get another person's opinion. i ain't really that great right now.

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AT: iS SOMETHING WRONG ON YOUR END?

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AT: i SHOULD HAVE GUESSED THAT THERE WAS CONSIDERING THAT YOU'VE DITCH YOUR WRITING STYLE,

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AT: aND USUALLY THAT WOULDN'T BE SO CONCERNING BUT THIS IS YOU WE'RE TALKING ABOUT,

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AT: yOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN A CREATURE OF HABIT FOR THE MOST PART,

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TC: IT'S HARD TO EXPLAIN, BRO... BUT WE RAN OUT OF SOPOR, AND MY HEAD'S MOTHERFUCKING HURTING. I GOT SOME OTHER THOUGHTS GOING ON...

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AT: ((brb!

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TC: things rattling up in my thinkpan like motherfucking crazy, i ain't in my best mind but i'm clear-headed enough to tell you that i ain't.

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TC: ((Okay

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TC: probably ain't your biggest concern about what i'm feeling like, but since you motherfucking asked, i guess saying it's fine. i dunno... it feels like i got someone else in here saying things in my mind, and i know it is but i can't all motherfucking help it.

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AT: tHAT,,,

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AT: iSN'T REASSURING TO THINK ABOUT,

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TC: I KNOW.

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TC: you got other things to worry about, though, motherfucker, ask karkat maybe and when i'm feeling right up again maybe we can chill together, i don't know. not knowing if it's gonna go away neither.

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AT: mAYBE IT WOULD BE BETTER IF WE FIGURED OUT WHAT WAS GOING ON WITH YOU FIRST,

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AT: aND THEN DEAL WITH VRISKA LATER,

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TC: i think it's just me. think if we knew what was wrong we couldn't do anything anyways.

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TC: I WAS THINKING ABOUT MAYBE IT'S THE SOPOR, BUT THEN...

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TC: how come i'm hearing these wicked mean thoughts?

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AT: i DON'T KNOW,

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AT: bUT LIKE, yOU'RE NOT GOING TO ACT ON THESE THOUGHTS, aRE YOU?

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TC: I DON'T MOTHERFUCKING WANT TO... BUT MOTHERFUCK IF THEY AIN'T GETTING LOUDER.

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TC: i don't motherfucking like this

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AT: uHM,

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AT: lOOK,

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AT: a LOT OF CRAZY THINGS ARE GOING ON RIGHT NOW,

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AT: aND i KNOW THAT ALL THIS INSANE SHIT CAN'T LAST FOREVER,

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AT: sO MAYBE, jUST MAYBE, tHIS IS ANOTHER THING THAT WILL COME AND GO,

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AT: iT'S ALL BEEN FESTERING AMONG US FOR A WHILE NOW SO i THINK EVERYBODY IS JUST SNAPPING UNDER THE PRESSURE,

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AT: aND IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE NO EXCEPTION,

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AT: bUT IT'S OKAY, i THINK,

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AT: lET'S NOT BLOW THIS COMPLETELY OUT OF PROPORTION YET,

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AT: i MEAN, iT CAN'T BE ***THAT*** BAD, rIGHT?

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TC: I GUESS NOT. MAYBE IT'S PART OF THE GAME I HAVE TO GET OVER, LIKE A MOTHERFUCKING TEST...

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AT: yEAH! a TEST!

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AT: yOU HAVEN'T DONE OF THOSE YET,

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AT: sEE? wE'RE ALREADY SOLVING THIS SHIT OUT BEFORE ANYTHING GOES FROM BAD TO WORSE,

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TC: maybe... man, you so smart tav. maybe if i just think of this as a test they will go away. fuck these shitass thoughts.

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TC: MOTHERFUCKER...

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TC: i'm sorry for bothering you with this extra shit but motherfuck if it ain't scaring me.

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TC: ((Yay it crashed

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adiosToreador [AT] disconnected.

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TC: IT'S FINE... IT'LL GO AWAY, BUT FOR NOW IT'S JUST SCARING ME... YOU DON'T GOTTA WORRY.

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adiosToreador [AT] joined chat.

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AT: }:/

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AT: hEY,

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AT: wHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW,

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TC: on the horn pile... no one else is around.

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AT: i COULD MAKE A PIT STOP TO THE YE OLD HORN PILE IF YOU DON'T MIND THE COMPANY,

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TC: :o)

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TC: i wouldn't motherfucking mind, bro. don't know what any other motherfuckers are doing.

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AT: aW, wHOS CARES?

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AT: wE HAVEN'T HAD TIME TO OURSELVES IN FOREVER ANYWAYST,

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AT: iT BE BETTER THIS WAY,

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AT: iT'D*

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TC: YEAH, SOME TIME ALONE TOGETHER COULD BE MOTHERFUCKING NICE. :o)

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TC: maybe motherfucking chill out.

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AT: yEAH!

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AT: aND GET ALL THESE COMPLICATED EMOTIONS SORTED OUT,

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TC: SOUNDS NICE, TAVBRO.

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TC: come on come over here, then, don't keep a brother waiting too long. :o)

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AT: hAHA, i'LL BE THERE AS SOON AS i FINISH OILING UP MY ANKLES!

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AT: eQUIUS SAID IT SHOULD BE DONE EVERY OTHER DAY BUT i DO IT EVERYDAY JUST IN CASE,

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AT: aNYWAYS, i WILL BE THERE AS SOON AS i FINISH UP HERE,

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TC: OKAY. DON'T USE TOO MUCH, DON'T WANNA SLIP OR SOME SHIT.

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TC: see you soon, tavbro.

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AT: bYE, gAMZEE!

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AT: }:)

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TC: :o)

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AT: --adioToreador [AT] has ceased trolling terminallyCapricious [TC]--

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AT: --Already finished with one ankle, Tavros moves onto the other, making sure that everything is working properly without any squeaks or creaks to be heard. The can of oil is stashed back in his sylladex before he boards onto the one and only available teleporting pad stationed in the center of the room. Here he disappears in a flash of white light and reappears in the room where all piles were to be kept, in same fashion. He steps off the platform.-- gAMZEE?

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TC: *Gamzee, of course, was sitting in the horn pile the whole time, looking around anxiously as he waited and tried to tune out the voice in his head, yet it was persistant. He sighed heavily, chewing on his lip and fiddling with a horn before he saw a flash and looked up, his eyes wide. He stayed seated and soon recognized the figure standing there as Tavros. Who else would it be? He called out to him.* tavbro...?

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AT: --Tavros turned his head towards the voice, looking over piles upon piles of scrap metal and plush dragons before spotting Gamzee peering over the top of his own pile, He waved,-- rIGHT HERE!

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AT: --He crossed from his side of the room to where Gamzee was, stepping over a few objects here and there until he could safely seat himself next to his friend,-- gEEZ, i FORGOT HOW MUCH THE BOTTOMS OF THESE THINGS JAB THEMSELVES INTO YOUR SPINES,

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TC: THAT SUCKS... *He frowned slightly, but then smiled at Tavros.* THANKS FOR COMING, TAVBRO... LOTS OF SHIT GOING ON, GLAD TO HAVE YOU HERE. *He wrapped arm around Tavros's shoulders.* ...STILL THINKING ABOUT VRISKA?

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AT: yEAH, a LOT ACTUALLY, i DON'T KNOW WHAT DO TO, kILLING HER IS THE BEST OPTION I CAN CONJURE UP AND IT PROBABLY WILL ONLY EVER BE THE BEST OPTION BUT i'M AFRAID OF HOW THE OTHERS WILL PERCEIVE ME IF i MANAGE TO DO IT, --He lays back on the pile, just enough where it isn't completely uncomfortable for him especially with the new presence of a comforting arm around his shoulders,-- nOBODY PARTICULARLY ENJOYS HER COMPANY, bUT, i DON'T THINK THEY WANT HER TO DIE EITHER,

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AT: i DON'T KNOW, mY PROBLEMS ARE STUPID AND OVERLY COMPLICATED,

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AT: lET'S TALK ABOUT WHAT IS HAPPENING WITH YOU INSTEAD,

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TC: *he shrugs.* alright, brother... i'm not all sure what to say about it, though... it's getting louder... and... fuck, i should be talking about this with a moirail, right? *he sighs.* but i ain't got one of those. you're the next best thing, brother... but i'm afraid of turning you off and shit. like you said, it's probably a test or whatever but it feels like i'm failingn

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AT: dON'T WORRY ABOUT PUSHING ME AWAY WITH YOUR ISSUES, i REALLY DON'T MIND IT, jUST,

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AT: wELL, i GUESS IF I WERE IN YOUR POSITION i WOULD KEEP TRYING? i DON'T KNOW, i'M SORRY,

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AT: tHIS IS ALL NEW TO ME TOO, lOWBLOODS DON'T USUALLY HAVE THE SAME MENTAL ISSUES THAT HIGHBLOODS TEND TO HAVE,

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AT: hAS THIS HAPPENED BEFORE?

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AT: wHEN YOU'VE RAN OUT OF SOPOR SLIME BEFORE, hAS THIS HAPPENED?

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TC: NO, NOTHING LIKE THIS HAS HAPPENED... I GOT REAL MOTHERFUCKING IRRITABLE, BUT NO VOICES... *he furrowed his eyebrows together for a moment and pressed his hand to his forehead, then closed his eyes for a moment. He stayed in this position for a few seconds before sighing and holding his head in his hands.*

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TC: i just want it to stop... *he growled softly.*

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AT: mAYBE WE SHOULD TRY TO FIND YOU MORE SLIME,

2

AT: iT SEEMS LIKE AN EASY FIX UNTIL WE FIND SOME OTHER WAY TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM PERMANENTLY,

1

TC: THERE ISN'T ANY SLIME LEFT...

1

TC: maybe we can find a distraction. *he suddenly stood up and started walking, eventually just ending up pacing a few feet in front of the horn pile.*

2

AT: yOU'RE DISTRACTION IS TO PACE IN THE SAME SPOT?

2

AT: your*** omg))

1

TC: *He shook his head and slowed to a stop, then sat down.*

1

TC: let's just keep talking.

2

AT: lISTEN, mAYBE WE CAN GET YOU SOME SLIME,

2

AT: aS LONG AS YOU'RE NOT PICKY ABOUT WHERE YOU GET IT,

1

TC: I DON'T MIND... AS LONG AS IT HELPS.

2

AT: gOOD BECAUSE, yOU KNOW, wE DO HAVE RECUPERACOONS ON BOARD,

2

AT: i AM POSITIVE THAT NOBODY WILL NOTICE IF SOME OF IT GOES MISSING,

1

TC: do you have some slime in your recuperacoon, bro?

2

AT: mORE THAN i NEED,

1

TC: YOU WOULDN'T MIND SHARING...?

2

AT: nOT AT ALL!

1

TC: *He smiled a little.* we should test it out.

2

AT: aND WHAT BETTER TIME THAN THE PRESENT? --He stood up from his place on the pile, reaching both hands out to help Gamzee to his feet,-- sHALL WE?

1

TC: *He stood up, giggling.* LET'S, MOTHERFUCKER.

2

AT: tHEN IF YOU WOULD BE EVER SO KIND TO FOLLOW ME THIS-A-WAY WE CAN GET YOU THAT SLIME BEFORE ANOTHER UGLY THOUGHT POPS INTO YOUR THINKPAN,

1

TC: heheh, lead the way, tavbro. *he smiled and started walking forwards, taking his hand.*

2

AT: --Tavros smiled back, allowing Gamzee to take hold of his hand as he led them both onto the transporter, Here, they both vanished in a white light, morphing back into a physical form in another hall lined with six doors on each side,--

1

TC: NOW, WHICH ONE OF THESE IS YOURS AGAIN, BROTHER? *he looked at each side, the door to his own block was open.*

2

AT: iT'S BETWEEN ARADIA AND SOLLUX SO,,, --He stepped off the platform, dragging Gamzee along with him,-- iT SHOULD BE THIS ONE, --He stepped up to the second door at the end of the hallway, tapped in the code he had been given into the keyboard and took a step back, It swished open not two seconds later,--

1

TC: *Gamzee walked in without a word and walked to his recuperacoon, then looked over at Tavros and waited for him to come, feeling anxious.*

2

AT: --Tavros followed him in, pausing only a moment to press the button that would seal the door shut before joining him at the recuperacoon,-- uHM,

2

AT: dIG IN?

1

TC: *he shrugged and took a scoop with his hand, shoving it into his mouth, then doing the same thing a few more times and sitting on the floor afterwards.*

2

AT: --Tavros knelt in front of him after he had sunk down to the floor,-- iS IT WORKING? iS THIS WHAT'S SUPPOSE TO HAPPEN? wAS THE SLIME NOT UP TO PAR? tALK TO ME DUDE!

1

TC: *he shrugged.* i mean, it'll take some time for it to sink in but... i think it's helping.

2

AT: yEAH? tHAT'S GREAT TO HEAR,

2

AT: dO YOU NEED ANYMORE?23:41:57


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Exchange Student!golgothasTerror [GT] joined chat.

2

timaeusTestified [TT] joined chat.

1

GT: It took the better part of eight hours until jake’s plane touched down in the texan runway. His grandmother had signed him up for an exchange program in hopes that learning about a different culture would encourage him to give more thought about his future. Jake had never stepped foot out of the european borders so coming to america would definitely be an experience. Arriving somewhere in the afternoon jake had only a short amount of top to observe the camo clad natives of this state before parking himself in a bench at the airport entrance. Here he sat up straight, craning his neck over the airport crowd in an attempt to locate a member of his host family. Apparently one of them was suppose to come down and pick him up, bring him back home so he could unpack, and show him around. When it looked as if nobody was coming for him he pulled out the prepaid phone his grandmother had bought for him the day before he left london and dialed in the number his teacher had scribbled on a piece of scrap paper for him. He held the device up to his ear, listening to it ring.

2

TT: So, Dirk had been notified only an hour ago that there would be an exchange student living in the apartment with him. His older brother was a fucking professional at bad timing, considering this pleasant reminder was over text while the other was in LA. Thanks for that one. Now he has to share the house with someone he's never even met before. A Jake English, apparently. Dirk was supposed to be his ride to school by next week, show him around, let him get to know the city, blah blah blah. So, here he was, pushing through the heavy crowds at the airport. It was summer, but Dirk wasn't wearing obnoxious camo shorts like literally everyone else in the city. He was in his regular white t-shirt, black jeans, and sneakers. He heard his phone's obnoxiously loud default Apple ringtone go off in his pocket, and got it out to look at the number. A European one. He looked over to find a boy on a pretty old looking phone on a bench, letting the number go to voicemail as he got closer to the other. "Jake?"

1

GT: Jake heard the robotic voice alert him that the owner of the phone could not be reached at this time but if he wanted to leave them a message he could after the sound of the beep. He did not let the voicemail system get that far as he flipped the top part of his temporary cell phone shut, stuffing it in his front pocket shortly afterwards. About to get up and ask one of the locals for directions jakes train of thought was screeched to a stop when a blonde boy around his age approached him, addressing him by his name. He stood up, shouldering the straps of his backpack. "yes, thats me! Are you one of the striders?"

2

TT: Oh shit. This was definitely going to be interesting for the time Jake was going to be here. So far, they were polar opposites, from what Dirk noticed. Dirk was a bit tall and lanky, Jake seemed to have more muscle. Dirk was pale and freckly, while Jake seemed to most likely be outside a lot. Shit. Dirk never agreed to this, he didn't even know about it! His brother was literally like, hey, here's a kid, fucking enjoy! God damnit. "Yeah, I'm Dirk." It was sort of hard to hear him over the large crowd of people, and suitcases being thrown around. The entire hustle of this place was pretty uncomfortable. "Do you need some help carrying anything, or are you good?"

1

GT: "i think i can handle my hefty baggage." he pats the side of his camping back pack now full of supplies he was required to take with his to the states plus a few extra. "are we taking a bus to your home? Do i get to sit next to a wise cracking homeless chap who will unload a life times worth of advice to me? How many horses are around this area? I heard that texas has a lot of horses and firearms and closeted homosexuals! But, i am mainly interested in the first two out of those three, the last one is none of my business. Hey wait, i forgot to ask for your name! How rude of me, im going to be living with you the remainder of this year and i dont even know what to call you!" he stuck out a hand. "you already know who i am, but to recap my name is jake english. Your new roomie!"

2

TT: Dirk simply started leading this kid out of the traffic way as he talked about homeless gay people or something. He wasn't exactly listening to whatever the fuck he was talking about, nor could he hear him that well. Once they were a bit out of the way, he turned to him and quickly shook his hand, seeming a bit uninterested. Really, though, he was already so fucking stressed about this guy living with him. It's probably gonna throw his entire schedule off. "Dirk Strider." A simple statement before he tugged on Jake's arm a bit. "Let's just get outside without getting trampled, ok?" With that, he turned again, finally being able to lead the other to the parking lot.

1

GT: Jake held his hand a few seconds longer even after dirk had bluntly ignored it, allowing it to drop to his side once the other more or less dragged them both through the herds of people and across the blazing parking lot. He fanned his face with his free hand before sliding it across his already sweat slicked forehead. "cheese and friggin crackers, is it always this searing hot outside?"

2

TT: Dirk let go of the other's arm, looking behind him with shaded eyes, raising a brow slightly. "Yes, but it's not that hot out today. This is the coolest it's been in weeks." Maybe Dirk was just overly used to it, because it was pushing 93 out there. He was right, though, about today being one of the coolest in a while. So, dirk didn't really mind, nor was he sweating much at all. Once they got past the many, many trucks in the parking lot, they stopped at an actual car, Dirk using the button on his keys to unlock the doors. "You can put your shit in the trunk if you want."

1

GT: "could you unlock it for me? Or is it one of those that you can open up on your own?" jake walked around the car to the back, where he searched for the handle. Once locating it he gave it a soft tug, then another, then another. By the end of three minutes he had both feet on either side of the trunk now attempting to tug it open with both hands.

2

TT: Dirk just watched the other, eventually interrupting his struggle by pushing him out of the way gently and taking his bag and kicking something under the car lightly, making the trunk open. He settled Jake's backpack in the trunk before closing it, giving a sigh. "There's a motion sensor under the car for the trunk."

1

GT: "a motion sensor? Well, why did you keep it a secret for this long! Would have saved me the muscle power! And it wouldnt have made me look like a bumbling baffoon in front of those girls over there, not an hour in and i already have a group of foreign females giggling over my mishaps. Egad, what they must think of me." he rubbed his hands together in an attempt to get rid of the slight stinging that had made itself known in the time trying to force the trunk open.

2

TT: "I really wouldn't worry about that. Pretty sure they don't actually give a fuck, and neither do I. Let's just go, ok?" The last thing he said before getting in the car and resting his head against the top of the steering wheel. This was going to be the longest fucking period of time he's ever spent with someone. So far, he's already hating the fuck out of it. At this point, he sort of wishes he was just at home by himself again. That's apparently not going to happen for a while, though.

1

GT: Jake hopped into the passengers seat, moving around constantly as he strapped himself into place with his seatbelt. "gee wilikers! Forget outside, i can smell my bacon burning sitting on these man made sizzlers!!!" he pulls his shorts down in an attempt to cover more of his thighs. "hot! Hot! Hot tator tot! It is simply criminal to be expected to rest your caboose on these things! I bet you my life savings that we could cook eggs on these bad boys! What do you think, strider? Should we give it a go? Be like the mythbusters? You can be the jamie to my adam."

2

TT: "Or, you know, we could.." Dirk sat up and started the car, turning the air conditioning on and turning most of the vents towards Jake, keeping one for himself as he buckled up and switched the gears to reverse, backing out of the parking space before switching again and driving away. To Dirk, this guy talked a little too much, but that may be a good thing. It may actually get Dirk to open up a bit rather than just stay quiet in his room all fucking day, which is what he normally does. As he listened to Jake this time, he could tell that the other had a bit of a thicker accent than he'd noticed before. Bits and pieces of a southern accent could be heard in Dirk's voice, but it's usually pretty well hidden with a monotoned type of voice.

1

GT: He turned his head over towards dirk, waiting for him to finish his sentence. When he didnt jake filled in the silence that the other had left behind. "we could what? Do something different? You know, i am open to anything you throw at me! What would feisty youngers such as ourselves be able to do with the loads of free time summer presents us with? Shall we stroll on down to the corner store and buy was a pop or do we mosey on wards to the local rodeo where we watch in awe as- DEVILFUCKING DICKENS! Dirk! Dirk! Dirk!" by this point jakes head was completely out the window, he gaped as they passed by a gun store where a few elderly men sat outside polishing a few different kinds of firearms. Jake repeated tapped dirk in the arm trying to get his attention, eyes still fixed on the weapons. "look at those! Boy shitting howdy, would you get a load of those beauties! Pull us over! I have to get a closer look at those pups!"

2

TT: Dirk gave a sigh to the other's questioning. The end of the sentence was turning on the ac so the other would stop being so loud. That obviously didn't work, though, because he just KEPT TALKING! Holy shit! Dirk is going to lose his fucking mind by the time Jake goes home! Dirk tensed up when Jake raised his voice, finally glancing over at what the other was talking about after being poked a million times. The gun store. Wow. Dirk removed a hand from the wheel, tugging on the sleeve of Jake's shirt to pull him back in the car before rolling up and locking the windows from the panel on his door, giving Jake a small glare as they stopped at a red light, once again smacking his forehead on the top of the steering wheel before sitting back up again. "Can you just calm the fuck down, please?"

1

GT: Too busy admiring the pistols perched on one of the front steps jake didnt put up much of a fight when being pulled back into the car, nor did he fuss when the windows were rolled up and locked. All he did in response was press his face and hands again the cool glass, staring at the store until it was well out of their sight, only then did he sit back in his seat. "pardon my sudden burst of excitement but i couldnt pass up an opportunity to gaze upon those top notch displays of metal work! Did you see the designs engraved in those pistols? It must have taken them months, no. YEARS to get them just so! I wonder how old they are. Do you think theyre for sale? Maybe i could ship them back to my grandmother. Hm."

2

TT: "You can't even buy a gun here, much less ship it back. You have to be 18 and a citizen, and to my knowledge, you don't fit either of those categories. Also, they come with the engravings. It takes five minutes at a factory in Austin. You're welcome." Being this snappy to someone he just met wasn't his intentions, but he's never been around someone so loud, or jumpy. It was new, and it annoyed him to a new fucking degree. After the light turned green, he started driving a little further away from town, seeing large houses and tall apartment buildings. A familiar sight. His house, a penthouse at the top floor of an apartment building, was only minutes away from here.

1

GT: "five minutes, you say? Huh. I would have thought it take more time." jake began to flip through the radio stations, never really stopping on one. "what sort of things do you like to do, dirk? I am afraid that we never found ourselves a middle ground so far. I think we would get along a lot easier if we found a common interest. Why dont we start with food and hobbies? Tell me all about what activities interest you the more or your favorite dish!"


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(( This is a prompt for Dirk wherein he works with recovering victims of human trafficking and is acting as a temporary caretaker for one of their most recent cases. This is geared toward recovery and hurt/comfort, but due to the nature of the roleplay, it's in NSFW for content. No smut will be present in this, at all, and no romance without plenty of development. Any characters are welcome, but please run your choice by me first. Let me know if there’s anything else that needs discussing and enjoy. )) God, how did he get roped into this? Dirk was considered a prodigy all throughout his high school and university years; there was no doubting his skill was as genuine as they came, but alongside intelligence came egotism, and with a sensitivity to even the slightest changes in a situation but in people especially, there was a tendency to, as one of his old professors had put it with a healthy dose of stark amazement, "play puppetmaster." If something didn't go exactly as he'd calculated, Dirk would crumble almost instantly, and this was very, very much NOT according to plan. The actual plan? In brief, it entailed joining a special subdivision of the police department, gaining acclaim and the respect of his peers and superiors, being promoted, and enjoying as much notoriety as he could get. This? This was glorified babysitting detail. In retrospect, Dirk knew it was bound to happen eventually, but he had hoped it could have waited until he had more of a foothold in his career, not when he was so green he smelled like a fresh meadow breeze, but there was no help for it now and he would have to take his assignment like the adult he claimed to be. His department worked with human trafficking; more specifically, tracking down victims and separating them from the people that handled them. Dirk mostly worked with the technological aspects of each case with no hurry to have any part in doing the dirty work, but the clean-up crew had come looking for him regardless. It was more often than not the responsibility of a network of safehouses to take in and rehabilitate the victims that were often traumatised and suffering from a great deal of abuse and battering. However, once those resources were tapped out, it was up to the members of the police department themselves to give those victims a place to stay, and as luck would have it, Dirk was slated to be the caretaker of their latest recovery. Joy upon joys. It had to be some cosmic joke that Dirk Strider, resident stone-faced techmonkey and manipulative bastard, as proclaimed by those of his peers eager enough to make an enemy of him, would be put in charge of all things domestic and mothering. Toddlers caught one glimpse of his awkward fumbling in the face of anything even resembling the terror of "emotions" and screamed bloody murder, for god's sake. If there was anyone, anyone out there less suited for a job that took tact and delicacy, it would be him. Try telling that to his hardass of a captain; every complaint of Dirk's fell onto deaf ears, and there was nothing left to do now but square his shoulders, man the fuck up, and hope he didn't cause too much irreparable damage. After he'd gotten word that his charge was going to arrive later on in the evening, thankfully sedated for the ease of transportation, Dirk took to alternating between pacing the floor of his apartment and attempting to clear away the clutter of disembodied robotic limbs and gutted torsos with the wires still unattached and sticking out like innards he'd left lying around from the tinkering he did in his spare time. Finally, one of his female colleagues notified him that she was on his metaphorical doorstep and they were brought in, a plainly malnourished thing whose name he'd been informed of in their case file, though he was hard-pressed to recall it now. Though he had a spare room left abandoned since his younger brother had flown the nest, the two of them worked together to settle Sleeping Beauty on the couch with a pillow and blanket he'd managed to scrounge up from a linen closet filled to the brim with swords. At last, that part of his job was complete. Dirk bid goodbye to his coworker and settled on the floor nearby to fill out the requisite paperwork in order to finalise the arrangement of him having legal responsibility for the survivor until they were deemed rehabilitated and fit to rejoin society. He couldn’t help but wince at the wording of that, chewing absently on the cap to his pen as he marked his signature and initials in the appropriate place. Once that was finished, he passed the time waiting for them to wake by continuing to piece together one of his latest mechanical projects, one that was unfortunately slow going due to his numerous trips to the kitchen and back. Shit, he really did have a problem with stress eating. Not that he wouldn't eagerly go to his death before admitting it to anybody, mind, but it was a problem he could at least acknowledge in the privacy of his own thoughts, thank you very god damn much. Finally, after what felt like hours but what likely wasn't nearly that long, he was alerted to a sound that had him dropping his third consecutive glass of Orange Crush in order to rush back into the living room where his charge waited, apparently awake and alert. "Oh, wow, uh, hey there. Welcome to the waking world." Shit, now was the time to say something befitting of a caretaker. "Listen, I know you're probably ten kinds of disoriented right now, but there's no need to worry. You're safe now." Oh, god damn, the shades, he still had his shades on. Dorky pointed anime sunglasses were not what one would consider professional eyewear, and Dirk mentally kicked himself as he slid them off and into his back pocket, leaving the warm gold of his irises visible. It made him feel odd. Exposed. He'd get over it; there was no way it could be worse than what they must have been experiencing now. Belatedly, he realised that this was probably time for him to make introductions. "My name's Dirk Strider. I’m with the police and I'm the one you’re going to be staying with for a while. Not long, hopefully, just enough so that we can be sure everything's... uh, shipshape." Shipshape? Holy fuck, was he ever bombing this. "Is there anything I can get for you? Food and water’d probably sound nice about now, yeah?" Nailed it.

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